[SchutzhundMan]

today has been difficult. i just sold my streetbob 3 hrs. ago after having too many bad thoughts about what it would be like for my young kids if some lady texting hit me. I know this is something you know going in, but i guess it started to get in the way of fully enjoying the bike.

i sold the bike today for all of what i asked and i am not the least happy. suppose i'll put them money toward the backyard.
i asked the guy if i could sit on it one last time. it honestly feels like a part of me gave up to my fears and died. i wasn't a new rider and i still have the dirt bike.

i told the wife today in 10-15 years when the kids are grown i am buying another one right away.

now i know some of you will read this and give the typical response...oh you were never a real biker. you're right! i never claimed i was. i just loved riding on the weekends to relieve the stress and on weekdays think about the weekend ride coming up.
at least i got to do a long weekend trip to vegas bike week.

hopefully i'll be on this forum in 15 yrs. with my new bagger and 55 yrs old saying "i'm back!"

here is to a great forum!

Hey good luck to you harleybeg,i can't say i agree or understand that decision,but in the end its yours to make so good luck to you man.

 

[wanna ride]

when i sold the bike yesterday the weather was perfect for riding. bikes everywhere. at a light a group of 10 harley riders came up next to me. that was hard! i totally know what phat 96 is saying in the earlier post.

What NAZZDAK said is true. although i've had bikes when i was younger, I was afraid of it now because of certain responsibilities, not for my own safety.
thoughts of a possible accident should be in the back of your mind a little, it's what separates the good riders with the reckless ones. the problem is when it gets in the way of enjoying the ride. that's what happened to me.

but i wasn't pretending to something i wasn't.

Just be sure to look both ways when you cross the street, check your footing for banna peels and always look up because something may fall from the sky.
Life is what we make it today, we have no control of whats coming our way.

 

[Fartnokker]

I was pressured into selling my last bike by my ex-wife when my first child was on the way. I'd been in one major accident, and she insisted that she'd leave me, pregnant as she was, if I didn't do the "responsible" thing and sell it. I did, and always resented her for it.

Current wife encouraged me to buy my FXR, even offered to help pay for it when we were dating, and supports me fully, even in spite of my new 6-month-old young'un. The difference is night and day.

I do understand what you're feeling, the conflicting emotions and all. You probably did the right thing, but the suggestion about a project bike is a tremendous one. I just saw Softail frames for $499 somewhere recently...

Love those kids, but preserve their father's zest for life, as well.

 

[89Road_Rumbler]

For some reason you're making me feel guilty. Not really, but respect your decision like I respect mom. Thing is I bought my bike about 2yrs. ago. When my son was about 2, but before we knew my daughter was coming. Never second guessed the decision, me or the wife. Actually it was a "glad we bought the bike now, cause now with two kids, we'd never afford one." Thing is you enjoy what you do, you get the things needed. Anything can happen at any time. Family always comes first, to me, but my riding is for me. Being selfish or not, it soothes me. Like others have said, good decision if you are afraid of riding. Not of the bike, but afraid in your way. I feel that I went the total opposite way you did, buying after a kid, but it's a bonding thing for me and my son. I've posted plenty of pics of him turning a wrench on my bike. LOL.
I go to work everyday, traveling the Garden State Parkway there, and think more of crash and burn in my '97 F-250 more than I do on my bike.
Just had a bad thought/memory right now, but had a buddy with a dirtbike when I was younger. Hit another rider in a trail, head on around a bend. Wound up getting a tracheodimy(sp?) after the accident. Pretty bad shape. But it's just an example, can happen anywhere anytime.
Build a bike! Don't ponder on the decision. Do it. It'll get to the point that when you hear a damn helicopter, or a 5.0L w/a flowmaster exhaust on it go by you'll regret your decision and be miserable. At least if you got a frame and a wheel in the garage you can say, "soon, very soon".

 

[Ahar]

For some reason you're making me feel guilty. Not really, but respect your decision like I respect mom. Thing is I bought my bike about 2yrs. ago. When my son was about 2, but before we knew my daughter was coming. Never second guessed the decision, me or the wife. Actually it was a "glad we bought the bike now, cause now with two kids, we'd never afford one." Thing is you enjoy what you do, you get the things needed. Anything can happen at any time. Family always comes first, to me, but my riding is for me. Being selfish or not, it soothes me. Like others have said, good decision if you are afraid of riding. Not of the bike, but afraid in your way. I feel that I went the total opposite way you did, buying after a kid, but it's a bonding thing for me and my son. I've posted plenty of pics of him turning a wrench on my bike. LOL.
I go to work everyday, traveling the Garden State Parkway there, and think more of crash and burn in my '97 F-250 more than I do on my bike.
Just had a bad thought/memory right now, but had a buddy with a dirtbike when I was younger. Hit another rider in a trail, head on around a bend. Wound up getting a tracheodimy(sp?) after the accident. Pretty bad shape. But it's just an example, can happen anywhere anytime.
Build a bike! Don't ponder on the decision. Do it. It'll get to the point that when you hear a damn helicopter, or a 5.0L w/a flowmaster exhaust on it go by you'll regret your decision and be miserable. At least if you got a frame and a wheel in the garage you can say, "soon, very soon".

@gree:
except you should be saying "someday I will ride this"
take all the time you can to do the build, don't rush it.
If you want to know how fast 15 years goes by, just ask an old fart.
Or somebody who has a 15 year old kid.

 

[Bluzmn59]

Friend

Everybody dies. Not everyone lives.

Take care & God Bless

This.^^^

I am more of afraid of not living than I am of dying. I have been riding since I was 18 and my son is now 33. I don't think he would know who his father was if he was without a bike.

Everybody has to make their own decisions in life and you have made yours. More power to you.

 

[harleybeg]

thanks for the feedback.
i told the little boy, daddy sold the bike and he asked right away.." how much did you get for it?"
my little girl said..."why, i thought you loved it?"
the wife said..."well, we lost money on that!"

you try to do the right thing!

tell you, still feel crappy bout the decision and i'm already looking at used road kings on the net. funny thing is for a bike that has about 5-10k more in miles and a few years older than the one i sold, road kings are the same price, maybe a little more than the what i sold my bike for.

if this feeling keeps up i'm upgrading from a streetbob to a road king. a bike i was always gonna get down the road anyway!

 

[rob71458]

I thought you were going to say that your wife said "Well Daddy loves you more than the bike", but women will be women.

 

[Coolmaker]

@gree:
except you should be saying "someday I will ride this"
take all the time you can to do the build, don't rush it.
If you want to know how fast 15 years goes by, just ask an old fart.
Or somebody who has a 15 year old kid.

No truer words have ever been spoken... @gree:

 

[Scrubs]

A Road King sounds like something that would cheer you right up after a seemingly rotten experience...one door closes, another one opens.

 

[Tsani]

my little girl said..."why, i thought you loved it?"

Why is it that little kids can put it right into perspective?

the wife said..."well, we lost money on that!"

Not to jack the thread, but this right here is an eye opener. She looked at that bike in the wrong way. Hey, it's a motorcycle, not an investment!

I do wish you luck.

 

[Coolmaker]

I am more of afraid of not living than I am of dying.

A friend of mine has a saying....

"it is better to live one day as a Lion, than 100 years as a Sheep"

 

[navyman]

I quit riding when my kids were growing up. Looking back I sometimes think of all the good rides I missed, but overall have no regrets. I started riding again in 2004 after the kids were gone and have been riding about 15,000 miles a year. I retired four years ago and have been riding my ass off. My wife was very appreciative of the time I spent off the bikes, and now is very happy to see me riding. She is not into riding that much, but does ride occasionally and goes on a trip every year or so with me. All is good. You have to do what is right for you and your family.

 

[Fartnokker]

It really is a pretty much no-win situation, bro. It just boils down to decisions that you can live with. I've lived both sides of it; the real trick is to make decisions that you won't be bitter about.

Just take your time, and don't make any knee-jerk moves. You've got all the time in the world, and once you are riding again, whenever that may be, you'll be okay. Hang in there.

Edit: Anyone who doesn't empathize doesn't appreciate the situation. You can say "Yuck Fou" to the wife and get another bike now. And yes, she'd be right that you lost money on the deal for no good reason, and who knows? It may lead down the road to divorce. You'd lose your kids, your family, but you'd have a motorcycle. Is that a good trade? If anyone thinks so, they're a f**king idiot. Should you have to choose between a bike and a family? No, but life is neither fair nor perfect. I'm walking proof of that.

My wife the psychotherapist talks about teaching my kids the principle of delayed gratification. You save up money towards a long-term goal, rather than pitching a fit about not getting what you want right this second. My 7-year-old has a bank account & does chores to earn money towards getting a Nintendo DSi. He'll appreciate it when he finally, and learn life lessons in the process.

This may be a delayed gratification moment, that's all I'm saying. If you look at it that way, it might make it easier to be at peace with it. Just a thought.

 

[rickr01]

today has been difficult. i just sold my streetbob 3 hrs. ago after having too many bad thoughts about what it would be like for my young kids if some lady texting hit me. I know this is something you know going in, but i guess it started to get in the way of fully enjoying the bike.

i sold the bike today for all of what i asked and i am not the least happy. suppose i'll put them money toward the backyard.
i asked the guy if i could sit on it one last time. it honestly feels like a part of me gave up to my fears and died. i wasn't a new rider and i still have the dirt bike.

i told the wife today in 10-15 years when the kids are grown i am buying another one right away.

now i know some of you will read this and give the typical response...oh you were never a real biker. you're right! i never claimed i was. i just loved riding on the weekends to relieve the stress and on weekdays think about the weekend ride coming up.
at least i got to do a long weekend trip to vegas bike week.

hopefully i'll be on this forum in 15 yrs. with my new bagger and 55 yrs old saying "i'm back!"

here is to a great forum!

Everyone has to do what best for them and their family. I respect the fact that your thinking about your children first. Years ago a true biker was a person true to themselves, sheit on what others think. In my opinion your the truest of bikers.

 

[DMacLeod]

Sorry to hear that. I went 10 years without wheels due to family obligations. Not again, now my wife wants me to buy her a bike of her own.... She was content to ride as a passenger for years but.....

 

[BVBOB]

It's simply about priorities and you chose your family over yourself, I can't find any fault in that.

 

[SchutzhundMan]

I hear all you fathers and i am one also to 2 teenage sons[17,15] and i say live your life because when they are able to make their own decisions they are gonna live theirs without a concern in the world of what sacrificies you made.Hey i love my kids with all my heart but lets face it when buddies,girls and all that start to come into play what you did for them becomes a after thought.

 

[nummy]

Due to the risk associated with motorcycling, I also took a break from riding on the street while my kids were little. (8 years)

Good for you for putting your responsibilities to your family ahead of entertainment....not an easy decision.

My kids are old enough now, and there were plenty of motorcycles for sale when I returned to the biking scene.........

See you in a few years !

;-)

nummy

today has been difficult. i just sold my streetbob 3 hrs. ago after having too many bad thoughts about what it would be like for my young kids if some lady texting hit me. I know this is something you know going in, but i guess it started to get in the way of fully enjoying the bike.

i sold the bike today for all of what i asked and i am not the least happy. suppose i'll put them money toward the backyard.
i asked the guy if i could sit on it one last time. it honestly feels like a part of me gave up to my fears and died. i wasn't a new rider and i still have the dirt bike.

i told the wife today in 10-15 years when the kids are grown i am buying another one right away.

now i know some of you will read this and give the typical response...oh you were never a real biker. you're right! i never claimed i was. i just loved riding on the weekends to relieve the stress and on weekdays think about the weekend ride coming up.
at least i got to do a long weekend trip to vegas bike week.

hopefully i'll be on this forum in 15 yrs. with my new bagger and 55 yrs old saying "i'm back!"

here is to a great forum!

 

[sjason597]

I hear all you fathers and i am one also to 2 teenage sons[17,15] and i say live your life because when they are able to make their own decisions they are gonna live theirs without a concern in the world of what sacrificies you made.Hey i love my kids with all my heart but lets face it when buddies,girls and all that start to come into play what you did for them becomes a after thought.

Holy crap as callous and uncaring as what he says sounds...I agree w/him!!! Go figure?