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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
New information released today by the Harley Dealers Asociation




Beware of synthetic oil, it can do terrible things to you and your beloved motorcycle. It will not only leak out of your engine faster than you can put it in, but it will also cause your oil filter to clog and implode, dumping debris and dirt into your lubrication system. It also will make every part of your bike permanently slippery because of its linear molecular chain dispersion action. Then it will leak onto your kickstand causing it to retract automatically, dropping your bike on the ground! But that's not all... Synthetic oil will round off your gears and spin your bearings. It will also splatter onto your seat, causing your girlfriend to fall off in the apex of a turn and she'll never ride with you again. Synthetic oil coats your dipstick and your timing window with a whitish pro-emulsification additive that is both non-removable and highly corrosive. Synthetic oil will completely leak onto the ground overnight and your dog will drink it and die. Synthetic oil will wear out your tires and make your battery leak. It will give you the desperate need to urinate after you put your chaps on and then jam your zippers shut. It will contaminate your gasoline causing your bike to stall on railroad tracks and accelerate uncontrollably near police cars. It will make it rain during rallies and on weekends. It will overlubricate timing chains causing them to jump teeth and break your valves to bits. Synthetic oil chemically weakens valves and causes the clearances to change every six miles. Then it melts the black soles of your riding boots night before you walk across your new carpeting. While riding past groups of attractive women it will cause both of your handlebar grips to slip off at the same time so you smash your windscreen with the bridge of your nose. It also causes your swingarm to crack, your studs to break, and your rotors to warp, and then it voids your warranty by changing your odometer reading to 55,555. It also dries out your wetclutch and wets your dryclutch. It makes your clutch slave cylinder seal fail in the heaviest traffic on the hottest day of the year while putting an angry wasp in your helmet for good measure. Synthetic oil hides your 1/2" socket and puts superglue on your earplugs. Synthetic oil will scratch your faceshield and make your gloves shrink two sizes. Synthetic oil stole your neutral and sold it to the Chinese for $1.25. Synthetic oil will make you grow a tail. Synthetic oil will write long crazy e-mails to your Internet friends and then sign your name at the bottom.
 

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The next message from the MC was "Thou shall not charge over MSRP"

:D
 

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That explains my tire wear. And I thought it was because I rode it, who would have known?
 

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NEWS FLASH

Harley announces it is safe to use Synthetic Oil.

Followed by the introduction of the newly created Harley Synthetic Oil "Slick Hog", the Motor Company announced today that it is safe to use Synthetic Oil in your Harley Davidson Motorcycle.

When asked why they were so against the oil before the response was Well, we didn't make synthetic oil before!

:D
 

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Discussion Starter · #14 ·
When asked why they were so against the oil before the response was Well, we didn't make synthetic oil before!

As a service to the family the MoCo announced that each six pack of the new genuine HD synthetic oil will include a CD that plays country music backwards, a feature only found on the single disc player on the new HD TM motorcycles. This feature explains the slightly higher cost compared to similar units, but you do get the dog, the pick up truck and the OL back. :D
 

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What The....?

It's not fair to pick on the feeble minded!!

I was getting really tight in the arse until I got to the acceleration in front of cop cars line. Man I laughed my ass off.

I've had one of the worst weeks of my life... I really needed that. I've been criticized for mt twisted sense of humor a time or two, but now I know there are more out there like me.

Thanks for the lift.

Budman
 

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Dipstick!, Dipstick? Where'd it go.............? :D
 

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HIPPO said:
As a service to the family the MoCo announced that each six pack of the new genuine HD synthetic oil will include a CD that plays country music backwards, a feature only found on the single disc player on the new HD TM motorcycles. This feature explains the slightly higher cost compared to similar units, but you do get the dog, the pick up truck and the OL back. :D
OH, H3LL, not the ex-OL back!!!!! Thanks for the heads-up HIPPO. That would have been a bi^ch. Guess I need to go to ASMOIL instead.
 

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Re: Re: Re: The dangers of synthetic oil

medicinewoman said:
the only thing synthetic oil does'nt do is make people sterile..
or maybe it does?? ;)

Cheri
I wish
 
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