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Last weekend a buddy of mine was at work on his construction job (WI pipeline) and was hit by a large sheet of metal and crushed underneath, he has both legs broken both above and below the knees, his left knee is shattered, they did surgery on that today, his right hip is dislocated and the ball part is broken off and he will be having surgery for that on thursday(15 hrs estimate) he also has two broken vertabrae and a gash to the back of his head (hardhat broken in two). He has not been awake since the accident, they are keeping him that way, the good news is that there appears to be no brain damage,(other than prior) and no paralysis. What I need from you guys is some ideas of what I can do for him, he will be in for a long hospital stay and is used to being active, I need Ideas of what I can get him or do for him to keep him occupied and his mind off his problems, he is going to need a lot of motivation to help with recovery when he comes to and realizes what kind of shape he is in. I'm picking his bike up tomorrow to bring it to my place for storage, maybe a new paint job before spring would help motivate him to get back on his feet. OH, and a prayer if you have a spare wouldn't hurt either.
 

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Bob, God speed for you friend's recovery.

I was laid up for 8 weeks about 20 years ago with a herniated disk, no where near as severe as your friend. But it was the little things that friends did for me that meant the most. I used to be fanatical about my lawn and my buddy kept it cut for me, aerated it, and over-seeded it for me. Other people helped my wife around the house on things I couldn't do. Just some thoughts.

Good luck, your friend is lucky to have someone like you.
 

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He is going to need friends. believe me, if he is anything like me, he is going to be an asshole to be with. He is going to want to give up. He is going to be in pain, and unless doctors have changed much in the last 5 years, they are going to pull the pain meds quickly. The pain is what drives you crazy. They were afraid that I would get addicted, believe me, needing drugs every day is much better than living with chronic pain. They finally gave up trying to convince me that I was not in pain. as long as i don't abuse it, I get what I need.

I hope that your friend can find a doctor that cares. His wife could very well divorce him, believe me, he will not be fit to be with part of the time. He needs you even when he pushes you away and yells at you. i came real close to doing myself in because of pain and how I was forced to live. The insurance companys will play him, hoping he suicides. he needs a good lawyer and if another company or contractor had something to do with the accident, make sure that the lawyer knows. You get very little if hurt on the job, but if a 3rd party is partially responsable, he might have a shot at keeping his home.


Good luck, you both will need it.
 

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You sound like a good friend. Get him every bike magazine you can, if he's into that. If you want to start a fund to help pay for the paint job I'd be willing to throw in a few bucks. Paypal would probably be the best way for others who want to pitch in.

My dad's cousin had some drywall fall on him a long time ago. He wasn't as fortunate as your friend and is paralysed from the waist down but he kept going because of friends and family. They gave him things to look forward to.

Your buddy is going to be a different person, at least for a while, especially if he remembers it, but just treat him as you always do. Let him know that he's is still the same guy.
 

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Originally posted by hdmarsh77
Get him every bike magazine you can, if he's into that.
I was going to suggest the same thing. He may not be alert enough to appreciate that from the get go, but I know if I were laid up in the hospital for a lengthy stay that would be a most welcome way to help pass the time. Obviously, storing his bike and doing other things he can't take care of himself (shoveling his driveway in December?) are greater gifts, but I would get most stir crazy cooped up in a hospital room and bike rags would be a good distraction for me. Best wishes to your friend.
 

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I don't know exactly where you are in relation to our BlackSheep Wisconsin chapter, but we have a nomad in Wisconsin by the name of Ron Grams -- here's his e-mail: [email protected]

If you're anywhere nearby, he'll come visit your buddy in the hospital while he's recovering.. with a Bible! Always good to see someone in leather show up. I will pray for your friend.
 

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Wow, prayers for your buddies quick and complete healing. The ideas about a paint job sound like just the thing to make him want to go through the pain of physical theropy and get back out in the world. Also the mags will help keep the fire burning when all looks bleak. I had seven vertabre fused and a hip replacement 11 years ago and my shovel at the time was a P.O.S. my buddies took the bike without my knowledge and redid the entire bike. Once I rolled out of the house and stated the p.t. they brought it back. Darn man, the looks of that pretty old girl made me work my butt off to get back on her.
BC
 

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That's a tough break, wishing your friend a full and fast recovery.
 

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The new paint job idea could backfire. Bikes are very personal and I don't know if I would want someone having my bike painted without asking me. I guess it depends on the bike and the person...

Put yourself in his shoes... what would worry you most if you were in the hospital for a long stay? For me it would be my bills and stuff. Just the mundane tasks of paying them and also making sure my place was being kept up. Hope he gets well soon.
 

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How about hooking him up with a laptop, internet service and teach him how to surf sites like this and his other interests?
 

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Once he seems to have some of his mental capacity back, get him word games. Simple ones at first, then more challenging. Crosswords, word search, suduko. Anything that stimulate his brain. Prayers go out.
 

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Thoughts and prayers for a quick and full recovery! As well as strength and energy for everyone that's helping him. God bless all of you! We all need friends like you!!!

Lots of visits and whatever you can think of to occupy his mind during the times that no one can be with him. Any pictures you may have to remind him of how good life is. Slowly start talking about things he can look forward to.

Keep us posted if any type of fund is set up.
 

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First, you are a good friend.
Quite some time ago, I wrecked. Broke my leg just below the hip, then the impact split my femer three ways.
I was laid up for 3 months, most of which was either traction or ICU. Complictaions during surgury, blood clots.
Could not even get out of bed for most of the 3 months.
I was not as bad as your friend.
But I will tell you first hand, he will be extremly depressed, confused, and totally disoriented at times. Medication, location and trying to figure out what happened, why it happened to him. Be prepared for him to mentally breakdown to a point, let him know it is OK.

Take care of his family if he has one. help him take care of the house and his bills. (these will be on his mind) Get his disability ins going and help him with the doc bills, (not paying but with ins)

Some one said laptop, internet etc. Make sure the laptop will be secure.
get him some DVD's.
When I was in, they did not have cable. How many times can someone watch the same episode of Mash?

Be prepared, he will be back and forth and need help with physical therapy. If you are married, family etc, explain to them you will help him.
Always be up beat, never negative.
No matter how bad it looks, do not let it show on your face. Make stupid jokes about dancing, anything to be postive.

I even had one of my friends dump his bike and was my room mate.
Make friends with security so you can get him real food when he can eat.

Just be there for him. My friends were, he will need all the help he can get.
 

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Bob,
First off let me say that he is one step ahead already having you for a friend.
He is going to be in pain, and the after that it becomes a mental game. I was in a fixator for a full year 3 different times to correct a short and mangled left femur. My support group was great, but at times I don`t think they could grasp how it mentally effects a person who was once active and now cannot be for a while.
Be there for him, listen to him and try and take him to places that take his mind away for a while. The paint job is a nice idea too!
 

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Bob, Lots of good thoughts for a complete recovery from mid-michigan.
I don't know what to add to all the suggestions. All I can say, is be there for your friend. True friends, (and he sounds like one), are hard to find, and even harder to replace for whatever reason.


dzlfitr
 

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First off, thanks for all the well wishes and ideas, finally got a chance to see him on friday, a couple of buddies and I went to see him in the hospital and spent most of the day there, they have him set up with the internet and his mind is finally getting good enough to use it. We picked up some mags and handheld video games for him. He is pretty busted up, his legs have more stitches than a raggedy ann doll, they are already working at having him move them and we got to stay and watch his treatment, he actaully moves his legs some already, I was both shocked and amazed, he has several plates and screws in both legs, his biggest problem at the moment is getting his vertabrae healed, ended up 5 were cracked along with a few ribs. He his in amazingly good spirits and it was just a darn good thing he was a tough SOB before the accident. Wish he were a little closer so I could visit more, will be some time yet before he gets home.
 

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BVBOB,
As someone said here, it's the small things that really make a difference.

Although I think storing the bike is a good idea, I would suggest you put it up on a jack, change the oil, spray the tires...etc...but then just cover it. You have to consider that he may not ride for a very long time if ever.

I understand that you want to give him a goal, but for now, keep those goals achievable in the short term, don't give him a goal that he may never reach. If he gets back on the bike, it will be there just the way he left it, that is what I mean about doing small things.

If you've ever been laid up for a long period you know that the little things are the toughest of all. Getting your mail, changing a furnace filter, cleaning the oven...all of those million things that you do in the course of your year that all of a sudden you can't do. And most of us are too proud to ask for help. Believe me, it's the small things that that will make a difference.

As St. Therese of Lisieux said; "we can't always do great things, but we can always do small things with great love."
 

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Wildchild said:
Once he seems to have some of his mental capacity back, get him word games. Simple ones at first, then more challenging. Crosswords, word search, suduko. Anything that stimulate his brain. Prayers go out.
I agree! When I was layed up this spring, I needed things to keep my mind active. When my aunt was in her accident (kept in drug enduced coma for ~3-4 weeks), it took her a long time to get to the point of caring about anything outside of her hospital room. Let your friend come around, be there as much as you can for him & his family.

I wish the best to them!
 
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