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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Long story short. She wants out and dosent care who she hurts in the process. My first and foremost concern is for the kids and what they are being put thru and the fact that I get at least 50/50 custody. It would also be nice to keep the bike that we bought last year. It's payed for and has only my name on the title. Any advice would be great.:badmood:
 

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Huge Member
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Get an appraisal that you both agree on, then give her half of whatever equity you have in it. If you can settle without lawyers, you'll both have more money. Good luck.
 

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I agree with FLSTFLEA, got a good friend or a brother you can trust?
 

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EASY DOES IT
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flstflee said:
seel the bike to a life long buddy..for somewaht less than the value..give her half
Yep...if I had it to do over...sell it right now for a paltry sum...buy it back later...do it now before you're served and it'll be all yours later when ya but it back!!!
 

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Longtime Asphalt Cowboy
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flstflee said:
sell the bike to a life long buddy..for somewaht less than the value..give her half
Well, that would make a great story or joke but doesn't work that way. If you sell it it must be for fair market value and if you live in a community property state, she's get half of FMV. The courts can even go back up to 2 years in some states to recover property sold by you if it's determined that you were attempting to hide real property pending a divorce.

I agree with Fourstar, get an appraisal and work it out.

o~\o
 

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A friend that recently went through one asked "Do you know why a divorce is so expensive?" :hmmm:

I said no why!

Because it's worth it! :thumbsup:
 

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Judges don't get to be judges by being stupid. They know all of the tricks people use to get to the other half of a divorce, like opening charge accounts and maxxing out credit cards and selling/giving away community property to avoid splitting the equity, and several other so called "tricks" that are too numerous to mention. They don't take kindly to shenanigans, either. When one side or the other starts the process, things have no where to go but down hill fast. Mark my words: If you can settle without lawyers, you'll both come away happier and better. If one or both of you tries to pull a fast one, you'll both end up with attornies and the attornies will have all of your stuff/money and you'll both be miserable and as broke as they can make you. Best wishes to you, and I hope you come out if it well.
 

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Tell her you want the bike. Give her something in equal value...Like all the furniture "she" picked out. You don't want any of "her" furniture except 1 TV, and a recliner. Go buy an airbed, and a foam(waffle) padding for it. Have her buy you out of 1/2 the value of the house. Go buy a condo or townhouse with a garage. Get plenty of condoms, you're going to need them. I was single for two years after 20 married. WOOHOO! Chicks dig Harleys! If you meet a girl who likes kids and Harleys...take her for a test ride. :brows:

Thorns
 

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Thorns said:
Tell her you want the bike. Give her something in equal value...Like all the furniture "she" picked out. You don't want any of "her" furniture except 1 TV, and a recliner. Go buy an airbed, and a foam(waffle) padding for it. Have her buy you out of 1/2 the value of the house. Go buy a condo or townhouse with a garage. Get plenty of condoms, you're going to need them. I was single for two years after 20 married. WOOHOO! Chicks dig Harleys! If you meet a girl who likes kids and Harleys...take her for a test ride. :brows:

Thorns
Dude, now yer talkin'!:chopper: :wootdnc: :boobies:
 

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I feel for you..

From your comments about her, its gonna get ugly.. I hope not, but seen it too many times.. The stats show the DUMPER has made this decision over a year ago. NO emotions on her part right now, she will be business like ( like show me the money) while the DUMPEE (YOU) will be emotional at this time and not be looking out for YOUR best interest... She is NO LONGER your friend or partner, but unfortunately the enemy now....

Be prepared for the boyfriend to show up. 90% chance there is one.. Not sure if your a no fault state, but maybe a PI to follow her.. Be cool and DO NOT let her know about anything.. You might want to see a lawyer ( bet she already has) just for advice.. I hate em too, but the first time is usually free...

I would freeze any joint credit accounts you have with her RIGHT NOW, and any savings MOVE ( do not spend) to a seperate account with YOUR NAME only.. I disagree with the above statement that she cannot spend it.. I see it all the time.. My girlfriend is a banker and helps guys with canceled checks and such looking for what SHE did with the money..
The last three guys ( My GF helped) had proof and evidence of HER taking all of there savings, and one could PROVE she had been planning the divorce for over 2 years, and the judge said "TOO BAD".. While you are married to her they are JOINT accounts....

Your scoot might be the least of your concern right now.. Watch your backside so you might be able to buy one in the next 10 years...

Good luck
 

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Total Nutcase
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Get a lawyer ASAP... and get a good one. I know people say to try and work it out without one, but you can no longer trust her. Like others said, she is now the enemy. Main thing is, worry about the kids and your rights. Bikes can be bought and sold as long as you live, but you've only got one shot with the kids.

If possible, eliminate her means to fight back... take all the money out of the bank, close all credit accounts, and take anything possible out of her name. Get into a mindset that you are at war. Do not supply the enemy. Get a PI to dig up any dirt on her and then use it in court. Courts are not as slanted against men as most people think - it's just that men are pushovers when it comes to fighting a woman. We've been taught all our lives to not hit girls, so that thinking carries over into divorce (which is just a big legal fight). Smile at her and hug her, then hit her financially, hit her emotionally and become ruthless. It's your only hope.
 

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TX Hill Country Explorer
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JamieWG said:
Courts are not as slanted against men as most people think
Maybe not in your neck of the woods but in Mississippi where I got divorced all the courts care about is that your child support is paid. As a man, you will get bent over and pay for everything. This is not just speaking from my own personal experience but from the observations of all of my friends that have also been through divorce there.
 

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JamieWG has said it best,You need a lawer, he will probably file a temp. order of restrant aganist her to keep her from taking any assets, and her laywer will do the same to you.The personal property that has accumlated between the two of you will become pawns in a game of give and take, everything has worth, The house, the contents, cars, motorcycles,riding lawnmowers, ect., they all have worth in a court of law. Also any stocks, bonds, retirement funds,401k are also factored in. I would save my money on the PI. because what she is doing if anything realy makes no differance at this time unless it has to do with abuse of the children. What ever is said or done you must take the high road at this time, do not do anything that will get you in trouble or that she can use against you in court or with the kids. The kids are the most important part of this, it won't be long before you will be having more fun than you have been having in a long time,and more leg than you will be able to handle. Your life will probably change for the better, but the kids life will be changed forever.
I hope this helps and good luck.
Nicky
 

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Divorce sucks no matter how it goes down. I went through it back in 91 and am still paying for it. Two of my three kids are adults now and the third will be in three years. They turned out pretty good for all they were put through with that bitch of a mother they have. I am so glad I am rid of her forever.
When I went through it back then I did keep the bike I had at the time along with my truck. We ended up splitting the procedes from the house we sold. She kept all the crap that was in it. This was in CA. We had both hired the best lawers in town at the time. What a battle it was. And it took a long time to get it over with.
 

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Here is some free advice. Hire the best atty NOW! Do not wait. Ask around and call the family court for names. Remember good atty's know the law--great atty's know the judge. Don't hire an out of town atty. You want someone who practices family law only and who goes to your court on a regular basis.

You need to get aggressive now. She is the enemy, and she may be feeling guilty now, so hit her hard and fast as her guilt will not stay long. Turn the dogs out.

As I tell my clients, it is better to try to settle a case from a position of power, Standing on top of the mountain and throwing rocks downhill vs trying to push a boulder up the hill.

It will get worse before it gets better, so hang in there and keep your children as your number one priority.

Regards, SSC
 

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Too Bad........

Like it wuz already said , the victims are the children. Both of you are parents and always will be to your children. I left my wife of 16 years, in 1993. Not my choice, but a man's got to do what a man's got to do.....
I lost just about everythang including my Gold Wing. All MARITIAL ASSETS will be frozen. No selling of anything. If your bike wuz bought while you were married , it's considered a MARITIAL ASSET and will be sold (more than likely) unless you strike up a deal with your former (and then get it in writing and have it NOTARIZED). We had a PUBLIC AUCTION. Any thang I wanted, I had to bid on. One of my pals bought my bike. MY lawyer costs were $17,000 and since I wuz a union carpenter , my child support payments were $320.00 per week for 3 kids. I had to move in with my parents in order to make child support payments. (That wuz humbling) Fast forward to today: I own my own house with an attached garage, two harleys, a Buick LaSabre and happier than a pig eating sh*t. My former lives about 3 miles away with her new husband (who my kids tell me they are now on the verge of divorce)
At times it seems it'll never be daylight again, but you gotz to prevail. I just paid the last of my support last week and if I had my former wife in a jug, I wouldn't pop the top long enough for her to grab a breath of fresh air.......
Oh yeah.
The judge gave me a choice: If I take half of the house, the biyatch would get half of my carpenter's pension.....I let her have the house and I get all my pension. She is still working 40+ hours a week and I've been retired for 4 years. You know that pisses her off........hehehehehe
Have NO PLANS on EVER doing that again.....
 

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POW-MIA said:
Long story short. She wants out and dosent care who she hurts in the process....
YOU ARE WRONG! She does indeed care who she hurts and she wants to hurt YOU!!
Alot of good advice here. Good luck!
 
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