The Affordable Harley Act
The U.S. government has just passed a new law called: "The Affordable Harley Act" declaring that every citizen MUST purchase a new Harley, by April 2014. These "affordable" Harleys will cost an average of $54,000 - $155,000 each. This does not include taxes, trailers, towing fees, licensing and registration fees, fuel, storage fees, maintenance or repair costs.
This law has been passed, because until now, typically only wealthy and financially responsible people have been able to purchase a Harley. This new law ensures that every American can now have an "affordable" Harley of their own, because everyone is "entitled" to a new Harley. If you purchase your Harley before the end of the year, you will receive 2 "free" helmets; not including monthly usage fees.
In order to make sure everyone purchases an affordable Harley, the costs of owning a Harley will increase on average of 250-400% per year. This way, wealthy people will pay more for something that other people don't want or can't afford to maintain. But to be fair, people who can't afford to maintain their Harley will be regularly fined and children (under the age of 26) can use their parents Harley until they turn 27; then must purchase their own Harley.
If you already have a Harley, you can keep yours (just kidding; no you can't). If you don't want or don't need a Harley, you are required to buy one anyhow. If you refuse to buy one or can't afford one, you will be regularly fined $800 until you purchase one or face imprisonment.
Failure to use the Harley will also result in fines. People living in the
desert; ghettos; inner cities or areas with no access to roads are not
exempt. Age, motion sickness, experience, knowledge nor lack of desire are acceptable excuses for not using your Harley.
A government review board (that doesn't know the difference between the Harley panhead or ABS equipped BMW) will decide everything, including; when, where, how often and for what purposes you can use your Harley along with how many people can ride your Harley and determine if one is too old or healthy enough to be able to use their Harley. They will also decide if your Harley has out lived its usefulness or if you must purchase specific accessories, (like a $500 GPS) or a newer and more expensive Harley.
The government will also decide the color for each Harley. Failure to comply with these rules will result in fines and possible imprisonment.
Government officials are exempt from this new law. If they want a Harley, they and their families can obtain Harleys at the expense of tax payers. Unions, bankers and mega companies with large political affiliations ($$$) are also exempt.
If the government can force you to buy health care, they can force you to buy a Harley.... or ANYTHING else..
Yea...it's that stupid...
The U.S. government has just passed a new law called: "The Affordable Harley Act" declaring that every citizen MUST purchase a new Harley, by April 2014. These "affordable" Harleys will cost an average of $54,000 - $155,000 each. This does not include taxes, trailers, towing fees, licensing and registration fees, fuel, storage fees, maintenance or repair costs.
This law has been passed, because until now, typically only wealthy and financially responsible people have been able to purchase a Harley. This new law ensures that every American can now have an "affordable" Harley of their own, because everyone is "entitled" to a new Harley. If you purchase your Harley before the end of the year, you will receive 2 "free" helmets; not including monthly usage fees.
In order to make sure everyone purchases an affordable Harley, the costs of owning a Harley will increase on average of 250-400% per year. This way, wealthy people will pay more for something that other people don't want or can't afford to maintain. But to be fair, people who can't afford to maintain their Harley will be regularly fined and children (under the age of 26) can use their parents Harley until they turn 27; then must purchase their own Harley.
If you already have a Harley, you can keep yours (just kidding; no you can't). If you don't want or don't need a Harley, you are required to buy one anyhow. If you refuse to buy one or can't afford one, you will be regularly fined $800 until you purchase one or face imprisonment.
Failure to use the Harley will also result in fines. People living in the
desert; ghettos; inner cities or areas with no access to roads are not
exempt. Age, motion sickness, experience, knowledge nor lack of desire are acceptable excuses for not using your Harley.
A government review board (that doesn't know the difference between the Harley panhead or ABS equipped BMW) will decide everything, including; when, where, how often and for what purposes you can use your Harley along with how many people can ride your Harley and determine if one is too old or healthy enough to be able to use their Harley. They will also decide if your Harley has out lived its usefulness or if you must purchase specific accessories, (like a $500 GPS) or a newer and more expensive Harley.
The government will also decide the color for each Harley. Failure to comply with these rules will result in fines and possible imprisonment.
Government officials are exempt from this new law. If they want a Harley, they and their families can obtain Harleys at the expense of tax payers. Unions, bankers and mega companies with large political affiliations ($$$) are also exempt.
If the government can force you to buy health care, they can force you to buy a Harley.... or ANYTHING else..
Yea...it's that stupid...